sealed with a kiss

These are the last words of reasoning in my mind, before I let all the excuses fill up the empty spaces where you use to dwell.These are my last and final thoughts, of all the things I probably should have shared. Instead I prayed to muster enough courage to stand on these shaky legs of mine ,and tell you whats been laying heavy on this heart of mine.These are the silient whispers,yes.These are the many quiet moments,yes.These are the prolonged long looks,yes.These are the reasons why.Perhaps you will hear all that I have to say.Perhaps you will throw it all away.Perhaps your heart will hear that old familiar voice and make you turn back around,just for your eyes to see right through me, and there to be no one around.

Deep breath in as a result from this heavy breathing, wich is what follows after running for a long time. The pretending is over, and yes it was me who sent all of those love letters.I know its hard to believe considering I signed it anonymous,and sealed it with a kiss. The writting is on the wall, perticurley in my handwritting after all. A blind fool could see it. A blind man showed me how to love, saying you cant see love,you simply finger it with your heart.Dont look at me like that, you dont have to say anything'; Ill go. Or maybe just move to the side;you've been looking over my shoulder all this time.But know that when I leave away, and you finally get the full picture.Once you look and let go , you cant go back.God knows I will not flinch at the sound of my name, or come running back. As you spoke and told all of the reasons why not, I quietly crossed of my list one by one. Every reason to keep you here, and tucked the ring back into my pocket.

Release of a heavy sigh, on account of you just dont get it. Im willing to take the broken pieces and build something thats never been made before.I guess you couldnt hear that part, her memory was screaming in your ears.And when you speak its her voice that you let leak.I've done this before, deja vu', and the past is ratteling in my bones. Shouting "do you remember më" and "this is what you will be". MAkes no sense I know, but Im not an open book, I prefer to remain a mystery. This way you can not find a way to break me, or change me, just watch me.Strong as an Ox,Im only as strong as my smiles allow me to show. But that You'll never know..that you'll never know. The train leaves now, no waves goodbye, I hate goodbyes so I'll skip that part.And just depart on a Jet plane..I dont know when I'll be back again.

These are the last words of reasoning in my mind, before I let all the exuses fill up the empty spaces where you once dwelled.These are my last and final thoughts of all the things i should have shared, but its all becoming lost anyway, and theres not much left to say. These are the last words I might have forgottento enclose in the letters...the writting on the wall, sealed with a kiss, best of all

Let's try this again,because Im sick of pretending.This mask I've been wearing grows weary upon this empty soul of mine. I once hoped and prayed to see you, soar across the midnight sky, and proove to the world wishes do come true by far.Lets try this again, because Im sick of running.The souls of so many fleeing cowards lay heavy on my feet with every long stride of a step I take.What if this storm ends, and leaves us nothing behind...will you still be here?Or will you dissapear with all the rubel that travels aimlessly away with the wind?

SAy it once more, it is much worse than ever before. I wont deny the only truth that exists, simply to temporarily give you a bit of satisfaction. WAs it something I said, because I refuse to bite my tongue any longer. Still Im constantly discovering new teeth marks from previous attempts to remain sensitive to how you'd feel so you'd stay alittle longer. Pick up your face, its no longer aligned in place. ANd if you have trouble finding it, its probably amongst the pile of empty faces; you change yours everyday.Your perfect halo ,that once rested above your head. Now no where to be found,but its left a faint ring around your head.

SAy it once more, how right nows not the right time, truth is Ill never be good enough, and the truth is the truth is a paralyzing puncture too my lungs.Was it something I said, is it in constant replay inside your memory?I cant stand these bright lights, that you've constantly put me under.I dont belong here, the colors of my soul shine so much brighter.

If I were to pack up my bags and fly tonight, I promise to come for you...but only if its what you wish.It was so dark, and since when did your heart go missing? Maybe its next to my sanity, which seems to be so far from my reach.Im getting closer, and theres the silver lining.You 've run so far ahead of me , leaving me to fend for myslef. I need to get out of here, the colors of my soul shine much brighter.

.

Lets try this again, because Im sick of pretending. This mask I've been wearing grows weary this empty soul of mine.

I once hoped and prayed to see you soar across the midnight sky, and proove wishes di cine true by far.Lets try this again, Im sick of running. I Refuse to bite my tongue any longer. Srill im constantly discovering new reeth marks from the previous attempts to remain sensetive to how you feel so that youd stay alittle longer

time

 Naked, numb,stupid,and your drunk.

And if cupid has a gun... then he's shooting.

Follow and let street lights guide you home, but move quickly,dawn peeks from behind the moon.Im anxious, you're restless, and this dangerous silience spills out the truth.Love's a fatal drug, and we drink from it until we fall.No cushion to break the fall,but the whole way down I can hear the sound of your voice echo off of  these four walls. I my hands beckon  you retreat 5 steps back; its all too much for me too come to terms with. Once again I find myself face to face with the truth,and I turn away yet again.

Why is it we seem to have so much trouble coming to terms with the truth? What will it take for us to realize the consequences we receive for our actions is all the proof you need? You can preach until you're blue in the face, but the truth is the truth will never erase..everything thats lead me to where I am now. Everyone sings about the sweet summer of '69. The very same Every one who cant seem to leave the past behind. I have come to be homesick for a place that I just might never be, I've become so homesick for such a face I may never know. Standing in front of a clock that laughs as it ticks away taking irraplacable moments with it in every second that goes back. Time won't let me go back. Time wont let me, never have I wanted to run so fast in my life. Steel back what was stolen from me, fix what was said between you and me but..Time wont let me go. Every new day paints a wrinkle on my cheek. Every day with you brought me smiles,sunshine, and kisses that make my knees week. Now as I stand before this face with hands, that promises me nothing ever last...if only time would let me go. There's always going to be dreams that stay among the planets that man will never reach, but darling this one quest I believe to be obtainable. I have become so homesick now for a place that I just may never be. I am so homesick for a face that I may never know;the truth is time wont let me go. Time wont let me go. Every picture that collects dust on my piano, all I wish is to return to the time when...time please let me gooo.

....Never really had my sweet summer of '69. There will always be those taunting memories  I will never be able to leave behind. If Only I could go back to that exact moment where, We could take back all those words we said...but time wont let me go.

As the sunrises you watch it from the reflection of my eyes.You look deeper to see emptiness yet HOPE, , with no fear and regrets but with a life of a soul that forgives but doesnt show. at times I am helpless and weak in the inside, but my face and smile will never show it.I am blind traveling down this old familiar road..senses sharper than ever can feel it from miles away..something is missing. Bitter cold wind eats away at my face, numbing my senses and freezing my tears; remaining drop like statues as a constant reminder of what once was, what could have been , and whats to come.Somethings coming.

Ask me once Ill tell you twice,but even when its repeated it somehow manages to become stealth and fade away, if not dissapear completly.Bye Bye remorse,although you've served me well.It seems it was only a matter of time before your true colors would show.I stood under red lights just to proove my love wasnt forged, we're at war, but it seems I'm loosing the battle within myself.A heart that cannot be bought,and yet a soul tagged with a price..so name your price?I like to look back and try to figure out how in the world did i get to be where i am now.Its an itch that ill never stop scratching, its a void that'll never be filled.Slipping, my nails dig into your flesh so i dont loose my grip, but honestly Im starting to believe that your giving up hope aswell. Whisper secrets, and i'll repeat your lies,fake a smile and compromise.

As the sun sets, you watch it in the refelction of my eyes, but never say goodbye it leads to the road of demise.She waits at the same door that was slammed in her face,questions and exuses quick to take his place. Slightly blinded traveling down an old familiar road.Hazey eyed, and yet senses sharp..I can feel the warmth drawing me in from that sweet humble abode.A heart that cannot be bought, and a soul tagged with a price.....they'll give you the world for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.You portray me as a beautiful girl. but im not all what im rapped up to be. My insides is full of indecision ; Im discussed with this world and the people in it. My Heart is slowly creating a new world of its own... and for a girl like me who's been threw hell and back its a real mission for me to create that illusions of a better place,at a faster pace,before i loose my place, and become trapped in space. Hes cursed with a cold soul and shes blessed with the patience to thaw it out with loves warmth anyway. I love my life, still there's the pressure and pain So I make sure that I'm grounded and able to maintain.